a 500km day . Normally , my mates and I head for roads that are joyfully free of the ATGANFI garbage . You might have to ride a bit further out , but that ’ s a small price to pay for cop-and-fool-free bitumen . But this Sunday was a little different due to Paul being with us , and we ended up on our way to Wollombi , which as any Sydney rider knows , is a very popular place to ride to on the weekend . As we approached the notorious Lemming Corner , we noticed a red roadwork traffic light , and three bikes . Two R1s and a Gixxer . All piped up and growling between the thighs of the most gloriously attired ATGANFIs ever . Their brand new top-shelf leathers , boots , gloves and helmets were just breathtaking , and my friends and I had lots of time to admire them , since the red light was taking its sweet time . Then it went green , and because I had a VMAX , The Door had a Rocket III , and Crew had a Speed Triple , we all raced the ATGANFIs to the first corner , and on towards the pub . Which is what happens on any Sunday . We won . Apparently , as Paul the L-plater told me when he got to the pub , being rounded up and bitched by smelly open-face helmet wearing , not-thinkingof-the-children scumbags on very large and stupid non-sports motorcycles apparently caused one of the ATGANFIs to take fright . So he crashed on the third corner after the red light at about 30km / h . Right in front of Paul , who was wobbling merrily along as L-platers do . “ Why did he fall off ,” Paul asked . “ It ’ s not like he was going very fast .” “ He fell off because he was a dickhead that couldn ’ t ride ,” I answered . “ But he had all that really nice gear . He looked like he could really bang .” “ Looks are deceiving ,” I shrugged . “ Those ATGANFI knob-smokers are like fake boobs . Fake boobs look sensational in dresses and sexy tops . But they are masters of deception . Get them naked and alone and they ’ re nothing but sad , misshapen fleshsacks of no integrity . They promise much , but deliver nothing and invariably disappoint with their performance . Just like the ATGANFIs .”
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