they feel and offer feel… well, like Brembos
should.
I didn’t quite hate the seat. I felt it could have
been more plush, but I’m thinking of going
up another 20kg in my squat regime. So I
probably won’t think that in three months.
And I will always have a sheepskin on hand.
I hated the petrol cap. You may not. But I
did. I like petrol caps where it’s a one-handed
operation: You put the key in, turn it, the cap
opens and remains attached to the tank,
fuel goes in, the whole show closes, the key
comes out, and off you go. Triumph (and a
few other manufacturers) complicate this
on all of its bikes by making it a two-handed
affair. I have no idea why.
The high-line pipes do sit against your calf
when you’re standing up, and they do rest
against your thigh when you’ve stopped at a
set of lights.
But heat-shielding is next level. Things are
warm, but even in traffic, I did not find it
annoying. I thought I would. But I didn’t.
On the road, there’s 90-odd horsies
stomping out 110Nm of torque just shy of
4000rpm – which is the sweetest sweet spot
there is, both on and off the road.
It’s not offensively tall – 870mm is not a big
ask. The XC is 840mm. Wear heels if you have
to.
I served the XE up and down some twisty,
hard-charging roads, and I found it flawless
on the bitumen despite the 21-inch front.
It steers light, it tracks dead true, and the
dual-purpose Metzeler Tourances coped
amazingly well – especially in the 10-bastard
downpour I rode and photographed it in. You
really find the worth of a great bike and tyres
when there’s water covering the road and
a bearded Hebrew is building an ark in his
yard.
I also took it down about 80km of fire-trail
dirt and even had the balls to press the Off-
Road mode. This allowed me to have my balls
in my mouth and spin a bit of dirt off the rear
tyre like Toby Price – except not very much at
all like Toby Price. But hand on my heart, it
was all so very manageable with the ABS off,
even at my very low level of off-road ability.
The Scrambler XE is a great bike. It’s the only
adventure bike I would ever consider owning,
because it is far more than just a superbly
capable off-roader and bitumen corner-
carver.
It’s more capable than I’d ever need or want
– which is exactly the case for almost all the
dedicated adventure rides. They are nearly all
better than we are, pilgrims.
What makes this one so different is its looks.
It’s gorgeous to behold.
And that’s when I sign on the dotted line.
I found it flawless on bitumen
despite the 21-inch front
60 KIWI RIDER