then it’s going down with all hands. Crucially, the
pillion must not contribute to this disaster.
So you can’t just sit there on the back of the bike
and let your new best friend carry the load by
himself. You must contribute. Being a pillion is a full
mind-and-body involvement. And I’ll get to that in
a sec. But before he/she even rides off, make sure
your feet are on the pillion pegs. Yeah, I know. It
sounds so simple, doesn’t it? How could anyone
mistake an exhaust system, a shock-absorber
bolt, and axle nut, or a swingarm for a pillion peg?
Fourteen Jack-and-Cokes is the correct answer.
of clothing or matching accessories are not
dangling down where all that stuff that spins
really fast might catch it. Scarves, fashion belts,
skirt hems, handbags, and Smartphone cables are
all problematical. And while it’s incumbent upon
the rider to make sure your flapping rubbish is all
tucked away, we really can’t see shit out of our
mirrors once we get on. Help us out. You have no
idea how long it takes to dig a $500 pure wool
pashmina out of our freshly-lubed chain, do you?
So now grip with your thighs, and hold on with
your hands. Somewhere. If there’s a pillion grab
TUCK IT ALL AWAY
Ladies, if you’re wearing heels, and if you’re
going out on the town you should be or we’ll
think you’re not trying, make sure your heel is
clear of the exhaust. The unseemly weeping
that will occur when we arrive at our destination
and discover your sexy new stiletto heels have
melted on and scarred the pristine titanium of
our new race system, will impact poorly on any
romantic interludes you may have planned.
Also, before we belt off into the night, it
would be smart to make sure any errant bits
How could anyone mistake an
exhaust system, a shock-absorber
bolt, an axle nut, or a swingarm
for a pillion peg?
KIWI RIDER 63