KIWI RIDER 06 2020 VOL1 | Page 59

HOG MEMBERS Very similar in self-righteous attitude to Ulysses members, they differentiate themselves from their similarly-aged compatriots by choosing to dress as gay pirates. Well, gay pirates with merit badges, and the more merit badges they can sew onto their cheap leather vests (which they wear so that car drivers will think them to be Hells Angels from a distance), the more HOGalicious they are deemed to be by their fellow members. It’s like pig-heaven has been chromed. THEY CAN BE FOUND At HOG rallies, Harley dealerships and any town with scones, tea and jam that is not more than an hour’s ride from the GPO. VROD PILOTS These are the only people who wear tracksuit pants on a motorcycle, and who will soon disappear from the panoply of motorcycle riders now that Harley’s VROD is no longer being made. They are also the only people who buy those close-fitting novelty open-face helmets and get into arguments with the police about their legality. Many of them boast Taser scars as a result. THEY CAN BE FOUND At Friday prayers, talking to steroid dealers at the gym, or outside any inner city nightclub when the hotties are all lined up waiting to get in and clearly just gagging to see fully sick burnouts as their ears explode. KIWI RIDER 59